The paradox of Perfectionism
Perfectionism is often seen as a desirable quality.
It's the answer a person might craftily give in a job interview when asked what their weaknesses are, because secretly they think it still makes them sound good.
This is because lots of us don't actually understand what perfectionism really is.
Perfectionism can be mistaken for the striving for excellence or having high standards but perfectionism in practice is far more sinister.
It makes us strive not for excellence but for an ever increasing standard that continues to get higher and higher, eventually making it unreachable.
People with perfectionism usually measure their self worth by whether they are able to achieve the goals they have set for themselves, so if the goals become unrealistic, this makes them extremely vulnerable to low self esteem and low self worth.
Also the process of going after these goals creates extreme pressure on people leaving them feeling anxious and on edge.
That means that actually perfectionism can impair performance- The paradox of perfectionism.
Here are a few telltale signs that you may be a perfectionist:
1) Reassurance seeking:
Asking people to double check things for you to see if you have done them properly.
Putting off something or waiting for the "perfect conditions to start" because you are worried it won't be good enough when you do.
3) Over organising and planning:
If you find yourself excessively writing lists or rewriting lists you have already done, then this could be a tell tale sign that you're a perfectionist.
Looking at a piece of work, or even yourself over and over again to check for mistakes or blemishes.
5) Avoiding new situations or challenges:
Not wanting to try new things just incase you can't do them perfectly.
If some or all of these points resonate with you then you may want to talk to a counsellor about where your perfectionism may have originated, what maintains it and how to challenge perfectionistic thinking.
Get in touch with us today to start this process on: